Well was looking for a break....maybe a nice trip, a little trip, a broken wrist tripping over my elliptical was not the break that I was praying for....come on God, work with me a little!! Cut me some slack, please, I know you are testing me. I get it, I need to learn to slow down, I need to let go, I need to appreciate what I have, that it could always be worse, I get it, I really do get it and try to practise it!
This first 10 days has been brutal the most pain I have experienced since getting diagosed. It turns out I broke my wrist in 5 places, and needed to go in for surgery a week ago. I had to have a plate and 6 screws put in to keep my bones in place. I think I have been in shock and denial that this would not be a big deal but it has been a little bit of a set back. Chemo is on hold until next week. Jason has been such a god send, making meals, doing everything, really, as I am mostly couch bound as I nurse this wrist back to good health. Have been on pain medication, which I have needed for 10 days now. The swelling is showing signs of coming down, but am needing to ice my arm around the clock.
I keep thinking I will find a note from Jason that says; I didn't sign up for this.....adios. That's not who Jason is, but know he has his moments has and I know how thankful and very grateful for his love and for his care I am. Taking care of loved ones is probably harder on, the caregiver than the patient many days. It is a tough road at times and requires a lot of love, patience and understanding. Thank you to all of you again close friends and family, and a special thank you to you sweet Jason. Your committment to our love and our relationship overwhelms me at times. We have prayed, shed many tears, shared many laughs, and had a few disagreements as we struggle through this journey together.We will share much joy and happiness I promise you...it is just around the corner...
At times I feel useless, and guilty that someone has to do so much, it shuts me down sometimes. I did so much at one point in my life, multi-tasking career, kids, part of me thrived on being so busy, the more I had to juggle the stronger I felt...I need to find me again in this new chapter of my life. Right now I feel a little lost, it is hard to shift gears, to go from high to low....I have been through these transitions before, I will rise up, just in a low spot today...
I can't change what is happening, only choose my attitude of how to face and deal with everything.
Sometimes I wonder how I am going to climb the next mountain that I am faced with, and so far am pushing through one day at a time. Remembering my many blessings helps and that I am not climbing alone.
Chemo Day
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtCxGEDR_NQ
Stormy: Hedley ---The sun will shine again :) Peace Out!
This first 10 days has been brutal the most pain I have experienced since getting diagosed. It turns out I broke my wrist in 5 places, and needed to go in for surgery a week ago. I had to have a plate and 6 screws put in to keep my bones in place. I think I have been in shock and denial that this would not be a big deal but it has been a little bit of a set back. Chemo is on hold until next week. Jason has been such a god send, making meals, doing everything, really, as I am mostly couch bound as I nurse this wrist back to good health. Have been on pain medication, which I have needed for 10 days now. The swelling is showing signs of coming down, but am needing to ice my arm around the clock.
I keep thinking I will find a note from Jason that says; I didn't sign up for this.....adios. That's not who Jason is, but know he has his moments has and I know how thankful and very grateful for his love and for his care I am. Taking care of loved ones is probably harder on, the caregiver than the patient many days. It is a tough road at times and requires a lot of love, patience and understanding. Thank you to all of you again close friends and family, and a special thank you to you sweet Jason. Your committment to our love and our relationship overwhelms me at times. We have prayed, shed many tears, shared many laughs, and had a few disagreements as we struggle through this journey together.We will share much joy and happiness I promise you...it is just around the corner...
At times I feel useless, and guilty that someone has to do so much, it shuts me down sometimes. I did so much at one point in my life, multi-tasking career, kids, part of me thrived on being so busy, the more I had to juggle the stronger I felt...I need to find me again in this new chapter of my life. Right now I feel a little lost, it is hard to shift gears, to go from high to low....I have been through these transitions before, I will rise up, just in a low spot today...
I can't change what is happening, only choose my attitude of how to face and deal with everything.
Sometimes I wonder how I am going to climb the next mountain that I am faced with, and so far am pushing through one day at a time. Remembering my many blessings helps and that I am not climbing alone.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtCxGEDR_NQ
Stormy: Hedley ---The sun will shine again :) Peace Out!
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