This journey has me looking at my priorities even closer these days, as I remain optimistic for the future, I also remain realistic that with the aggressive cancer I have I need to be prepared to live with cancer. What I have been told is my cancer is incurable, although we will continue to pray for a miracle, realistically what I can hope for is to try to find the right treatment, and drug and natural combination that will stop the tumours from growing, and medically the best case scenario would be to shrink the tumours, prevent any new ones from developing, and buy me as much time as possible. To also to continue to work hard at managing the side affects from chemo.
It has been a tough place to be at times, as on one hand you want to ensure you are doing everything possible to ensure the best outcome, which involves around the clock appointments, and a complete change in diet, and ongoing work on creating the most positive state of mind. And on the other hand you want to ensure you make the most of every day and the relationships that mean so much to you. Finding all the time you need to do these things is the challenge, and like all things, I need to strike a balance that allows me to do all of these things...I will get there.
I want to create a bucket list and start to work towards achieving everything possible on that list. This has been a goal in the past before for me, but it definately takes on more urgency when you are racing against time.
One of the great joys in my life has been travel. I have been fortunate to see alot. It started in 1989 when I went to Australia for a year. Encouraged by my parents they gifted me a plane ticket of anywhere I wanted to go. I chose Australia and planned out my trip. I couldn't find anyone of my close friends who wanted to go, or who were able to go so I started to ask around and found a girl through a mutual acquaintence who was also wanting to plan such a trip, and gave her a call.
Heather and I had a trip of a lifetime. It was February 1989. I was 22 years old. My trip started in Hawaii, Heather couldn't come right away so I started the trip with my Mom, which ended up being a great experience for both of us. We went to Hawaii and then to New Zealand where we spent a couple of weeks there travelling this amazing country. It was beautiful in New Zealand there are over 4 million people, the capital is Auckland and it is divided by a North and South Island to explore.
We had a great time, and we spent some time on the South Island, travelling to a place called Queenstown. For my first adventure, I had always wanted to try White Water Rafting and there was a grade four river in this Canyon called the Shotover river that was supposed to be an amazing adventure. My challenge was talking my mom into doing it, she had some fear of water, so it would be a tough sell.
Upon arriving to Queenstown, we met up that night with a family from Colorado. A Mom in her 70's and her son and daughter in their 40's who took a trip every year together. They happened to have booked that White Water adventure the next day, and that evening we met up and started to drink wine together. We drank alot of wine and by the end of the night we had talked my mom into signing up for the trip the next day. The daughter had gone on and on about what an expert rafter she was, and the son, was interesting as he lost his leg in a motorcycle accident and was wearing a prosthetic leg, and after a few glasses of wine, I asked him if I could try it out...lol, strange I know, but wine does funny things to you, and well I was curious!
The next day we headed out, and the drive through the Canyon scared the crap out of both of us. It was an old winding mining road, with twists and bends and cliff edges that was only big enough for the jeep we were riding in. I was so happy to get to the rafting spot. My mom was so nervous, and looking back I was so proud of her, this was a huge step out of her comfort zone.
By the time we started out, Sue who was the "Expert Rafting Expert" was getting on both of our nerves. She was in our raft. We headed out, and it was such an exhilarating, amazing experience, the river was fast, and there were 4 foot shelves that would drop and your adrenaline would pick up. Half way into the trip our "expert" reached out with her paddle and caught a rock, she was flipped overboard into the flowing river. I was laughing inside at this time, the expert was overboard trying to desperately climb back in to the raft. Of course I helped her, and she had some excuse for the dangerous angle she choose to reach her paddle out....Mom and I had such a good laugh over that one!!!
We made it to our destination, Mom and I both managed to stay in the raft, the "expert" was a little quieter from then on...we had experienced this great adventure together, my mom and I, and I will always cherish...I will continue to add a few more adventures to my bucket list over the months to come!
The purpose of life, after all, is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
There Aint No Second Prize
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LkFXbmELw6c
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